Fake cough didn’t work

Ignorance is bliss! Apropos of the wayside labourers who routinely imbibe tea procured from a nearby vendor, in unhygienic, low quality polythene bag. On two occasions when I explained them about its serious carcinogenic effects, they gave a patient, receptive hearing. A few of them might have relinquished this dangerous practice, I understand.

Earlier, few knew how dreaded Kovid-19 spreads; when its precise mechanism came to fore, the precept of social distancing as prime prevention modality was readily accepted, as witnessed at shopping points, in greeting with Namaste rather than handshake, etc. Some became too scary of each other, even avoided verbal exchanges and perceived any sneezing oldster as specter waiting to kill them. There was news about a lean & thin person who removed the mask for a while and coughed aside. The act so infuriated a passing-by Mr Suspicion that he screamed full-throatedly, “Conspiracy to kill me”, and tightly held the ‘culprit’ by the neck, as a butcher does with a hen. Thanks to a couple of youngsters who noticed the wrangle, intervened and saved the life of the innocent man suffering from cold.

In another incident, one Mr Opportunist of Malda Town thought, “Alas, I could also derive advantage from prevailing Corona-induced panic, like sellers of masks and sanitisers of all description at exorbitant prices. Incidentally, his urgent need to visit Guwahati on errand on open rail ticket tended to bring cheers.

Mr Opportunist tamped his baggage on a seat in an overcrowded general bogey. Then, as planned, he proceeded towards toilet and returned with feigned incessant sneezing all his way. In no time, all passengers got dispersed. The triumphant, lone Mr Opportunist, with satisfaction of an Oscar winner relaxed himself; tired as he was, he lay on berth and fell asleep.

Early morning, as he awoke, there was a platform in view. He asked a vendor, which station was that. As he heard, “Malda Town”, he was surprised. Confused, he exclaimed, “Wasn’t that the station the train left last night.” Prompt came the reply: “That train had left which was so meant. A Corona patient had boarded this bogey, so this bogey was shunted out.”

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The article was published (under the column Different Strokes of Edit page 4) in Assam Tribune on 9 August 2020.

Link: http://www.assamtribune.com/scripts/at.asp?id=aug0920/Page4

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