Respect is a great virtue, but you don’t respect someone just by declarations

The habit of respecting someone in earnest not only enriches and upgrades you morally but also builds rapport with a superior person thus evolving as a better person. The issue is, how do you pay respect?

Mr Jorawar Singh, 85, living in his desolate ancestral mansion in a mofussil town received a call from a distant relative. “Congratulations, Singh Saheb! Your grandson is entering the wedlock next week on Tuesday!”

The words came as a jolt from out of the blue.

So often, he had been exhilarated at the very thought of his actively participating in varietal pre-marriage, marriage and post-marriage rituals.

The crestfallen elderly called his son, “Is that true what I hear?” With no compunction in his tone and accent, the son retorted, “These days office kept me awfully busy in a new project. Then, the bridal family settled in a Gulf country suddenly planned to be in the town, and it was fixed. I respect you so much, dear Papa, my friends can vouch for it. We were so sorry to have missed you in engagement ceremony! Now, I appeal from the core of my heart – please grace this occasion by reaching here at least a few days before marriage”.

Sense of respect

Few people came to rescue you in hard or dilemmatic situations showing over years that they had been bankable. They helped you stay on righteous track, persuading you to do what must be done, and dissuading you from what must be avoided. They may be well above you in age, experience, knowledge, wisdom, skills, or just closely related. They were receptive to your intimate concerns. You feel gratitude towards such people and value association with them. Those who respect others due their political/ money/ muscle power or social influence, shift their loyalty when such person is divested of powers.

Skin-deep respect is nonsensical

Gratitude is an ennobling and morally elevating instinct available only to the fortunate. One without sense of gratitude shall not respect anyone. Such unfortunate fellow will also be disabled to acquire new knowledge, skills, knowhow, etc. because it is a condition to remain submissive, courteous and humble, in nutshell, respect people from whom you can learn. Respect implies recognition of the virtues of the other person. Your respect for others is an indicator of your regard for values; also you earn respect by paying respect to others. But foremost assess that your sense of respect is genuine, and not a sham and skin-deep. You respect someone by listening patiently to what the other person says, and complying with the precept offered. In case you have an opposite view, the other person should be convinced and agree to your diverent view.

Life turning events like settling for partner (for self, sibling, son or daughter), change of job or business, relocation to other city call for a foresight and broad vision. If you respect someone, you can draw upon his advice on such occasions. Such acts not only help us exercise a better option but also strengthen bonds between the two. In the process, the recipient emerges as a better, refined person.

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